She Hates Me
by Jen Felton
Summary: This is basically my view of the lives of Lily and James from 5th year to their deaths. goes through the ups and downs of their crazy relationsip. Involves all the marauders and other Hogwarts kiddos. Written after OoTP, so spoilerwarning. you can like it
1. Default Chapter

**Disclaimer: I want everyone to know that I own nothing. This goes for all the future chapters – I OWN NOTHING. The genius of Ms. Rowling owns everything.**

**Chapter 1**

**Beginning of 5th Year  
**  
It was the 1st day of 5th year, as Lily walked into the Great Hall to sit next to her friends, Samantha McKinley and Abbey Knightly.

"Can you believe it? We are already 5th years. Where have the last few years gone?" asked Sam.

"I don't know. Where have they gone, ladies?" said James Potter as he walked up behind the girls making them jump slightly. James was followed, as always, by Sirius, Remus, and Peter. The eyes of almost every girl in the school were also following James and Sirius. They were generally considered to be the best looking guys in the year if not the school and they were talented athletically and academically. They knew almost every girl would go for them. Almost, because Lily would never consider going out with either of them. To her they were arrogant, stuck on themselves, brats who weren't good for anything but getting in trouble.

The boys plopped down on the benches in the Great Hall across from the girls. James sat across from Lily, as always. "So Evans have you thought about me this summer?" It was a well known fact, at least to the Marauders, that James would like nothing more than to go out with Lily, and with any other girl there wouldn't be an issue. But Lily was hard headed and she wasn't going to go out with a big headed, Quidditch player, just to have the bragging rights of going out with James Potter.

"No, asshole," replied Lily promptly without even looking at him.

"Why not? You know you want to go out with me."

"No I don't."

"Why no-"

"Prongs, I would shut up now before she kills you, it's only the first day, after all. You have all year to get a date," commented Sirius casually.

"What makes you think he's going to get a date – ever?" responded Lily edgily.

"Hey, just trying to get him off your back for a second. Chill out babe," said Sirius defensively, as he had a clawing movement and hissed like an angry cat. 

"Yeah yeah whatever Padfoot. Well what do you guys reckon we do tonight? I mean we can't have our first night back be unadventurous," said James.

"I don't know. Anyone for Hogsmeade? The first full moon isn't for a couple of weeks, so no real adventures for a while," said Sirius.

"I like Hogsmeade! We should go there tonight," squeaked Peter. He looked ready to wet his pants with excitement. Peter never really looked healthy at any one point in time, he was always pale and always looked slightly sweaty in that paranoid, twitchy kind of way. He followed around James, Sirius, and Remus like they were living gods, and practically worshiped the ground they walked on.

"Calm down Pete. It's just a Hogsmeade sneak, it's not like we haven't done it before," said Sirius. Now Sirius by this point in his life was practically gorgeous in the hot, casual, mysterious, muscular kind of way, and he knew it. Girl after girl eyed Sirius with that hopeful look girls get when they see something they know they can't have, but want more than anything. Unfortunately, Sirius wasn't really interested in girls. He was only fifteen and in his opinion there was too much fun to be had without a girl getting in the way. 

The rest of breakfast went by uneventfully mostly because the marauders were busy making plans for the night, and the girls were discussing their summers.

"Well summer wasn't too bad ' cause Petunia hates me so much she stayed out of the way most of the time. I went to Ireland with my parents and cousins. That was pretty cool, but I always miss this place a lot," said Lily. Basically, Lily didn't get along her sister Petunia, they had sort of gotten along before Lily went to Hogwarts because Lily never did anything outrageous to embarrass Petunia. But when Lily found out she was a witch, Petunia shunned Lily and grew to hate her. Well actually, Petunia didn't hate Lily, although she acted like it and treated Lily like trash, she was just jealous that Lily was suddenly getting so much attention from their parents. Their parents were really proud that they had a witch in the family because it was, well, cool.

She was also a little jealous of Lily looks and popularity. Lily was a perfect weight, she wasn't petite, but she wasn't at all heavy either. She had thick, layer, red hair that fell to just below her the top of her shoulders. Lily was relatively pale, with a like blanket of freckles resting on her nose, and lightly spreading across her cheeks like stars in a clear night sky. In contrast to Petunia's lanky frame, and plain, straight brown hair and grey eyes.

"My holiday was pretty sweet too, we went to Italy and rode horses through the country. But I always miss hanging out with you guys when we're off of school," said Samantha. Sam was incredibly intelligent. She had thick, wavy caramel color hair that fell to just below were shoulder blades, and she was tan, from her summer in Italy, Samantha came from a wizard family, and she had a older brother, Topher who was a 7th year Ravenclaw. Samantha was the brightest of the three friends, although, both Lily and Abbey were very talented and clever, Sam made the greatest effort in her studies. She was always the one to keep Lily and Abbey in line, and she made sure that they got al of their work done. 

"Hey kids, I beat all of you as far as summer vacations go," said Abbey, "Because I went to the Quidditch World Cup. You know Ireland vs. the US team. It was kick ass! I had so much fun. I mean you should have seen the way the seekers played. They were amazing! And the chasers, gosh dang, they were awesome. One of them, Kristie Bell, she was amazing, and I got her to sign a poster for me. The US won though, that was bad, but it didn't matter the game was awesome. It went on for 12 hours! Wow, you should have seen –"

"ABBEY! Take a breath please. We love Quidditch and all, but I suggest you have this discussion about the way people played with James. Seeing as he is the new Quidditch captain for Gryffindor," interjected Sam.

Abbey was the most athletic of the three girls, and she was a chaser for the Gryffindor Quidditch team. Abbey was slightly tomboyish; but she was still a drop dead gorgeous brunette with crystal blue eyes. She had shoulder length dark brown hair that she always had pulled up into a messy bun or ponytail, and she hardly ever wore makeup. She didn't need to. But the best part about Abbey was that she wasn't just pretty, but she had the personality to go along with it. Abbey could talk your ear off if you got her going, and she loved to have a good time. If the boys were going out for an 'adventure' she was the one that wanted to go with them, and they let her because she was fast enough to run and hide and she was clever enough to get out of trouble.

After breakfast, the seven Gryffindors made their way to their first class, divination. They all knew that their divination teacher was a nut, but it was always good for a laugh. The girls sat around a table in the back corner, so that if they fell asleep Professor Rewtlany would not notice. The marauders sat at a table close to them.

"Ok students, seeing as your all in your fifth year, you will have to take the O.W.L. this year. And even though true seers are the only people who can do really well on the O.W.L. I am sure that with a lot of study and extra effort everyone can scrape by fair grades. I, myself, got a fantastic score on my O.W.L., but I'm not one to brag…" said Professor Rewtlany. While she was giving this little speech, the marauders were planning their trip into Hogsmeade.

"Time?" asked Sirius.

"8," answered James.

"Common room?"

"Yep"

"Transform?"

"No"

"Where?"

"Honeydukes"

"Cloak?"

"Yeah"

"Map?"

"Yeah"

"Girls?"

"Lily…"

"James."

"No girls."

"Don't you love it how guys can plan an entire night with a one word conversation?" asked Samantha. While the boys were discussing plans for the evening, the girls were marveling at the lack of words used to communicate plans. It was amazing James and Sirius understood each other so well, that they probably didn't even need words to communicate with one another. They were a pair you don't see everyday. Sirius and James were the best friends anyone had ever seen, if you saw James it was rare to not see Sirius somewhere close by, and vis versa. Neither would ever betray or hurt the other, and they stuck together like brothers, well they practically were considering that Sirius spent most of his time at the Potter's. Sirius was from an extremely dark-art-loving family. They were all in Slytherin, except Sirius and a few others, and the entire family supported Voldemort. When Sirius got tired of his evil family he left and went to live with the Potters for a while, but consequently he was disowned from the family. Not that Sirius really cared.

hey hey, ok I know that this wasn't exactly adventurous, but I was just explaining my view of the characters. Hope you like it and will r/r. I want to make a comment before I write any more chapters – please review. More to come.


	2. Get Over Lily

Chapter 2

Get Over Lily

"Ah, it is so nice to be back in school, don't you think so boys," said James, as he, Remus, Sirius, and Peter sat around a table in the shrieking shack. Sirius and James had "borrowed" some butterbeer from the 3 Broomsticks.

"Yeah, school is the best," said Sirius contently sipping his butterbeer.

Meanwhile, while the boys were having a relaxing time sneaking around Hogsmeade, the girls were in the Gryffindor common room, studying. The teachers had already loaded them with homework and they didn't want to start out behind in their fifth year.

"The O.W.L. isn't until the end of the year, why do we already have a ton of homework?" asked a tired Lily.

"I don't think we should be doing this tonight. It's our first night, why don't we have some fun?" asked Abbey. She hated to do homework, especially if it wasn't due the next day.

"Well, maybe Abbey is right, it is only our first night of class, I guess we can chill for a little while" agreed Samantha. "So what do ya'll want to do?"

"Do we always have to be 'doing' something, can't we just chill, and I don't know, talk?" questioned Lily. Sam was so uptight sometimes. She always thought that they had to have a structure to whatever they did. Samantha was a really 'A' type personality, she liked to always be getting things done; which was helpful to the girls most of the time. But every once in a while she needed to be persuaded to just take a break and relax.

"Well the boys sure grew up over the summer. Did you see how muscular they got? James and Sirius have obviously been working out. Speaking of James, Lily, did you notice how he was hitting on you? You really should go out with him," said Abbey.

"What? No, not James. He is so arrogant. He thinks that he has his pick of every girl in the school, and he should just walk up and they will fall all over him. Well, he's in for a reality check because there is no way in hell that I'm going to go out with him. Not now, at least," said Lily hurriedly. She was beginning to get tired of everyone telling her to go out with James. Did they really think she was so superficial that she would go out with James Potter, the king of superficiality? I mean he was really nice to her and the Abbey and Samantha, but sometimes he wasn't the best to younger students. '_Maybe it's just a teenage boy thing. They all think that they need to prove themselves, and showoff. He really needs to grow out of that'_ thought Lily. 

"Well if you don't want him, I certainly do 'cause he's hot," commented Abbey.

"Speaking of hot, Sam, your brother Topher is gorgeous," said Lily. Topher was Sam's brother, and yeah he was hot, but he was also very sweet and funny. He was a seeker on the Ravenclaw team, and he was the captain of the team. But unlike James he didn't run around showing off how good he was. 

"Well I could set you up with him if you want," said Samantha, "He talked about you a lot this summer."

"Really? I mean not that I care or anything…but…um…what did he say?" questioned Lily.

"Oh you know the usual stuff. You're hot, smart, nice, hot, funny, wants to ask you out, you're hot. You know the usual things guys think about."

"Oh…Ok, that's cool," said Lily trying to act casual. She really liked Topher and if Sam was telling the truth, and she probably was, Lily was getting very excited.

"So Sam, who have you had your eye on…." 

The next few days were rather uneventful. James laid off Lily a little bit, and he wasn't so obsessive about getting a date with her. Sirius had warned him to be careful with her, she wasn't the kind to go for a guy that hung all over her, and begged for her attention. So James decided to go for the I'm-cool-and-it-doesn't-bother-me-that-you-don't-want-to-go-out-with-me approach. Yeah, this lasted about a day before James started staring at Lily again. He was obsessed with her; he was always writing L.E. on parchment or imagining living with her forever. Frankly, it was getting a little scary, and even though James was trying to act casual about his obsession, Sirius noticed that he was more…um…'devoted' than ever.

"Hey James come here, I need help with this potions essay for Panes," said Sirius. Panes was their potions teacher, and he thoroughly hated all Gryffindors. He was the Slytherin Head of house, and he easily showed favoritism. His brown hair was always slicked back in a haughty manner, and his pointed features were always contorted into an arrogant expression. James and Sirius hated him more than any other teacher; however, the feeling was mutual. 

"No, you don't you already fin," but James was cut short by the significant look he was getting from Sirius. "Oh, er, yeah that essay.""Come here we need to talk alone," whispered Sirius when James came over. The boys left the Gryffindor common room, with the excuse of working on the essay in the library. They found an empty classroom, filled with comfy armchairs. "I love the room of requirement, it's so helpful sometimes," said Sirius as the best friends sat down next to each other. The boys entered the room, put a lock and silencing spell on the room, and sat down to talk.

"What do you want to talk about, Padfoot."

"You," answered Sirius simply.

"What do you mean, me? What have I done that requires us talking in private? Did you hear about the…"

"Uh…no, but we will discuss that later. Anyway, you need to get over Lily."

"I am over Lily!" replied James indignantly. He looked away from Sirius because he hated to lie to his best friend, and he knew if he looked at Sirius, he would know he was lying.

"Prongs, don't lie because you're not over her, and you know it," replied Sirius calmly.

"Ok, so I'm not completely over her, but almost."

"Prongs," replied Sirius in that voice people get when they know the truth and their friend isn't saying it.

"Ok, I'm madly in love with her. Happy?" said James slightly angrily. Who was he to say what he was feeling, or what he should feel?

"Yes, I am, but James, how do I say this nicely, She – Hates – You."

"I know, but she's perfect, man. She beautiful, funny when she's not talking to me, smart, nice to everyone but me, and did I mention she's perfect," said James sadly, this was starting to get a little depressing; although, he felt better now that he was talking about it with Sirius. "So how do I get this girl out of my head?"

"You need to open yourself to other people. James you're only 15! Don't stop at the first girl that comes your way, I'm not saying you and Lily won't ever be together, but for the time being look around and see if there is anyone else that interests you. I think she'll come around eventually, but at the moment she's just not interested. Try not to stare at her, focus on your job as Quidditch captain, and find a new girlfriend. You go out with all kinds of girls, I'm sure you can find someone who will be interested. There were a couple of hot 4th year Gryffindors, and the Ravenclaws are not too bad either," said Sirius. He had obviously practiced this speech because he sounded like he was repeating well rehearsed lines.

"How long have you been practicing this?" asked James, amused.

"A couple days why?"

"Sounds good, and convincing. Did Moony help you?"

"Yep."

"I'll try, but I'm not making an promises. Ok? Cause some things just aren't meant to be." 

"That's all I ask, plus um, this may not be the best time to tell you, but Lily is going out with Samantha's brother. You know the 7th year Ravenclaw?" mentioned Sirius gently. She was too, at lunch the day before Topher had caught her outside of the Great Hall and asked her out. They were going to Hogsmeade the next weekend.

"Oh…um…yeah…that's cool…I guess…he's the Ravenclaw seeker and captain, right?" asked an I'm-pissed-off-but-I'm-going-to-be-cool-about-it James.

"Yes…" replied Sirius tentatively.

"Well, that's cool at least he plays Quidditch, right?" asked James a bit loud with fake cheerfulness.

"Prongs, don't do anything rash," warned Sirius because the evil glint in James's eye concerned him, and he had a feeling the match against Ravenclaw was not going to be a pretty one.

"What would I do? I'm over Lily remember? Come on let's go back to the common room," said James as he got up and headed for the door. "Oh Padfoot, when's the first match with Ravenclaw"

"James, how would I know? You're the freakin' Quidditch captain 'member? Hey now, don't do anything to him" said Sirius threateningly.

"Who said anything about doing anything, I was just curious" replied James with a bad attempt to act innocent. Sirius followed him slowly, still concerned whether telling James about Topher and Lily was the right thing to do. '_Oh, man, if he does anything stupid…_' thought Sirius as he followed James back to the Gryffindor common room.

Meanwhile, Lily and Topher were wondering the halls talking, and planning their Hogsmeade weekend, next weekend. It was Friday, so they didn't have to do homework. Lily was thoroughly enjoying her time with Topher, even if it was only the first time they had hung out. She felt comfortable when she was around him, but there was something missing. Lily just couldn't figure out what it was exactly. It was like they just didn't fit right. Opposite the feeling you get when you slip on your favorite pair of worn in jeans; they fit just right and you feel as if you could wear them your whole life and never get tired of them. That was the feeling Lily was looking for, but she did not find it in Topher, and in the back of her mind she knew that he would never be those worn jeans. 

"So I've told you about myself, and life as a muggle-born, but what about you, what do you do in your free time and stuff?" asked Lily. 

"Well, where do you want me to start?" asked Topher, looking down on her with one of his killer smiles.

"Just start from the beginning," smiled Lily.

"Christopher William McKinley, at your service, my good Lady. Born on December 11, 1968. Currently 17, and 6 foot 2. Likes Quidditch, sleep, Lily Evans, long walks on the beach, and pina coladas. Has a younger sister, Samantha Lindsey McKinley, has 2 parents Andrew William McKinley and Molly Sara Brown McKinley. Goes by Topher, always. Wants to play Quidditch professionally, wants to get married and have 6 kids. One of the kids has to be named Faber because that name just sounds cool. And if there is twins, boy and girl, they have to be name Pip and Pippa because that would be cool. Favorite color is yellow. Favorite Band is The Darkness. Favorite song is She Thinks My Tractor's Sexy by: Kenny Chesney, just kidding it's actually Gin and Juice by Phish. Wants to visit Texas cause everyone loves a cowgirl. Thinks Lily Evans is damn sexy. Favorite book is the Cat in the Hat. If I was an animal I would be a bird of some kind. Wants a pony and Lily Evans….um did I mention I think Lily Evans is way kick ass? Yeah I think that sums up my life. Did I leave anything out?"

"No I think you covered it all," replied Lily smiling amusedly. '_Wow, he's pretty awesome'_ thought Lily

Hey hey kids. Hope you like the chapter, again I know not too much really happening, but I have to set the stage for more to come, right? Well that's what I think, anyway. Please, please, r/r. cya ya'll.


	3. James's Day of Fights

**Chapter 3  
**  
The week leading up to Lily's date with Topher, went by quietly. James was being unusually distant when it came to Lily, maybe it was because he had taken Sirius's advice and was now throwing himself whole heartedly into Quidditch. His team was practicing five times a week for two hours. They were a great team, but still it was a lot of work. And to top it all off the first match of the season was against Ravenclaw – not good. James was determined to kick Topher's butt, either by winning or literally kick his butt.

The team was James, Abbey, Cammy O'Riley, William Brown, Wiley Durgan, Katie McGuire, and Toby Clary. James was the seeker and captain, and he took great pride in the team he had put together. Abbey, Cammy and William were the chasers, Wiley and Toby were the beaters, and Katie was the keeper. William Brown was a fourth year. He was lean and athletic with chocolate brown skin and his hair was braided into short dread locks. Cammy O'Riley was a fifth year with Abbey, Sam, and Lily. Cammy literally looked like a lepracon, she was rather short, 5'1", had flaming red hair, an Irish accent, and pale skin. But she was exceptionally talented at Quidditch, and a real positive piece of the team. Katie McGuire was a third year on the team, but she was playing Quidditch before she could walk. Katie came from an incredibly dark family, she was the only one in the last six generations to be sorted out of Slytherin. She hated the dark arts completely, therefore she fled her family and went to live with her best friend, fellow Gryffindor Christi Tulli. Sirius and she had a lot in common. Katie was an excellent keeper, probably the best in the school, and her athletic build helped her to excel as a quick moving keeper.

Wiley Durgan and Toby Clark were both beaters they were third years, and best friends. Wiley and Toby were the comedians, along with James, on the team. Besides the fact that both of them were amazingly strong and rather agile on a broom, James half picked them for their personalities. They could always pick up the team when they needed it most. Plus, they were inseparable and they understood each other completely, making the way they communicated on the pitch amazing. But no one could have picked a odder looking pair. Wiley was rather short, 5'8", muscular, and stocky; whereas, Toby was tall, 6'4", and thin. Toby had blonde hair, blue eyes, and likely tan skin, contrasting greatly with Wiley's dark brown skin and creamy brown eyes. Yet both were surprisingly nimble and gifted beaters.

"He's working our asses off," complained Abbey. As she came in from a rainy practice that had lasted almost four hours. Abbey was wet and muddy and exhausted.

"Maybe your ass," said Lily laughing. James had asked Abbey out a couple of days before, basically as a rebound off of Lily. But Abbey knew it, and she really didn't care because she wasn't interested in James. She thought he was funny and hot, but there was no way they were going to have a 'relationship.'

"So your first real date with Topher is this weekend, right?" asked Abbey.

"Yeah. I'm excited, he is so much fun to be around. A little clingy, but fun," responded Lily. Lily had been looking forward to this weekend all week, and she wanted it to be perfect. They were going to just hangout around Hogsmeade and then go into the 3 Broomsticks. They weren't going to go to any of those romantic coffee shops or anything, Lily wasn't really into that kind of cheesy thing. "Are you going to do anything with James?"

"Well, kind of. We are basically doing the same thing you are, hanging out and then getting a butterbeer. This isn't anything serious," replied Abbey.

"You just want to make out with him, so you can tell your grandchildren one day that you kissed James Potter. True?" asked Lily playfully.

"Oh yeah, you know it," laughed Abbey sarcastically.

"See? I know what's really going on."

"You know me too well."

Finally, the weekend rolled around, and Lily met Topher at the front doors. He looked good in nice jeans and a yellow and blue plaid button up shirt with the sleeves rolled up. Lily thought she looked pretty good herself with jeans on and a western looking shirt. When she came up to him he lightly kissed her cheek, led her out of the castle, and on to the grounds. Right behind them was James and Abbey. James was trying hard to pay attention to Abbey who was asking him about a Quidditch move, but he couldn't tear his eyes away from Lily and Topher. He had been making an effort to think of other people besides Lily, but when he saw them together his stomach went into his throat. James was feeling something he had never felt before, but what was it….?

"It's called jealousy, kid," said Abbey, reading his thoughts. She could tell through the longing and confused expression on his face that he wanted Lily, but he couldn't figure out what he was feeling. James had never been jealous of anything or anyone before because he had always had it all – girls, friends, grades, money, popularity, talent, etc. Realizing that a day with Abbey may be pretty fun, considering she was one of the coolest girls he knew, James decided to make the best of the 'date' and push Lily out of his head.

Spending the day with Topher was going well. Lily and Topher always had something to talk about and they were having a great time, just messing around Hogsmeade. By the end of the day, they were tired of walking around, so they decided to go into the 3 Broomsticks. They walked in with Topher's arm around Lily's waist. "What do you want?" he asked as they found a table for two in the corner of the pub.

"Um, butterbeer. Thanks."

"1 butterbeer coming right up madam." While Lily waited for Topher to come back, she surveyed the scene around her. There were students filling every corner of the pub; they were all talking excitedly about the upcoming year or their plans for the week or the upcoming Quidditch match tomorrow. Lily was worried about the match because she didn't want James to do anything to Topher or vis versa. She obviously wanted Gryffindor to win, but if Ravenclaw won she was worried that James may attack Topher. Although James was 15 and Topher was 17, James a strong and athletic and he was a very powerful wizard. Probably more powerful than most of the 7th years.

"If he does anything stupid…" muttered Lily to herself as Topher came back to the table smiling as he set down the 2 butterbeers. Just then Lily saw James enter the pub with his arm around Abbey, and even though Lily wasn't the most fond of James, she felt a little jealous that Abbey was going out with him. It was a weird feeling because she definitely didn't think she liked James, but he had for some reason always been hers. It was like Abbey was stepping onto her property because for once maybe James had feelings for another girl. Without thinking Lily leaned across the table and started kissing Topher. He was a little surprised at first, but came around soon enough and began to kiss her back. Abbey saw this first.

"Um…James it's a little crowded in here let's go back out side. Come on," said Abbey with a slight panic in her voice. If James saw them kissing it could go from bad to ugly real quick.

"Ok let's g-" said James, but he stopped short when he saw Lily and Topher. '_You don't care. Remember? Come on dumb ass pull yourself together. They're going out and there is nothing you can do about it. Just let it go, and move on. Follow Abbey. This is stupid what am I saying I do care and this sucks. I'm going to beat the living daylights out of him. If Abbey would just let go of me I could attack him_,' thought James for Abbey had a death grip on his arm and was now digging in her nails to get his attention.

"James come with me and I'll take your mind completely off of those two," whispered Abbey seductively. She figured if force couldn't drag him out of the pub, seduction would. (a/n they don't do anything except kiss a bit…so no worries) With that James follow Abbey out of the pub and up to the Shrieking Shack.

The next day Lily woke up early to head down to breakfast, and get ready for the Quidditch match. She sat between Samantha and Abbey, Sam had already started to eat her breakfast. Across from them was Sirius, Remus, Peter, and James. Although, James looked like he was ready to blow chunks all over the table, and he refused to eat anything. He was shaking slightly, but he kept trying to look like he was brave and fighting through it. This was his first match as the captain and he hoped that his team was ready to tackle the older and experienced Ravenclaw team. Consisting mostly of sixth and seventh years, the Ravenclaw team was well bonded, and they knew all of each others moves.

The Gryffindor team was so nervous that most of them were just sitting there staring at their food. "Guys I think I'm going to be sick," announced Cammy to the whole table causing everyone in the vicinity to move over slightly.

"I'm so nervous look at me, my eye's twitchin'," said Wiley contorting his round features into a paranoid, eye twitching expression. Everyone gave him a small smile, but they returned to staring blankly at their plates shortly after.

"Everyone needs to eat something. You guys need your energy for the match," James kept telling his team. They all really looked up to him, you could tell because even though they all looked slightly green they all reached for some toast and began to nibble on it.

"I think it's time for the Quidditch teams to make their way down to the Quidditch pitch to get ready for the game," announced Dumbledore from the staff table. His eyes twinkled from behind his glasses, and he looked quite amused as James slowly, shakily lifted himself from the table.

"Team. Up," called James in a would be brave voice to his Gryffindor team.

"Good luck James, Ab, Cammy," hollered Samantha, "Oh yeah and Wiley, Toby try not to injure my brother too badly. I don't fancy taking him to the hospital wing due to a bludger to the head."

"Sure thing madam," replied Wiley and Toby with dramatic bows.

"Kill those Ravenclaws," yelled Remus as the team headed out to the pitch.

"Show them who's boss," squeaked Peter (getting a few odd looks, but oh well.)

"Good luck Cammy, Abbey, Potter," called Lily.

"James don't kill him, well at least not in front of Lily," whispered Sirius in James's ear, "Good luck you guys!" he yelled as they left the Great Hall.

Before they knew it the whole school was in the stands and the commentator Andy Brandlin (Gryffindor) was calling out the names. "For Gryffindor there is Knightly, McGuire, O'Riley, Clary, Brown, Durgan, and Potter! And for Ravenclaw, it's Perry, Jessup, Funnel, Shakeport, Jax, Tillings, and McKinley!"

Madam Hooch called for the captains to shake hands. James and Topher slowly walked up to each other as soft roll of thunder sounded in the background. They looked like they wanted to beat each other's head in, but resisted and settled to squishing each other's hands. Then the whistle blew and the game started.

"Oh great it's raining," complained Lily looking up into the sky, as a light rain began to fall.

"Are they allowed to play in weather conditions like this. I mean it is thundering," said Samantha worriedly.

"Yeah sure they can play in anything. And it's not really a problem as long as James remembered to put the water proof spell on his glasses," said Remus.

It was an exciting game, the chasers and keepers were amazing, but the seekers were what everyone was watching. Both were fantastic, constantly diving and pulling out at the last minute. After about three hours, the score was 30 to 20 Gryffindor. The battle was raging on the pitch as the rain increased to a downpour. The cloud cover was so thick barely any light could get through, lighting was the only way to shed light on the pitch.

It all came down to the seekers and who could catch the snitch because neither team was dominating the other. Then there was a flash of lightning illuminating the pitch, and Topher saw it. The little glint of gold hovered about three feet above the ground at the other end of the pitch. James was circling above the pitch, but he was closer to it than Topher. James would notice if Topher suddenly gunned it for the snitch, and James could get there faster. So Topher decided to slowly make his way up that way hoping the rain would make him slightly less noticeable. Then when he was closer than James he would floor it before James had time to catch him. Good plan, except when they got about even there was another crack of lighting and James saw the snitch too.

The two seekers raced towards the snitch, the wind and rain blinding them as they leaned over their brooms. The entire school held its breath because this was serious, someone was going to get it, and it was going to be ugly – they were too close. The boys raced towards the snitch so close that their knees were bumping into each other.

"Come on, Lets go," James was yelling at his broom.

"Move it," yelled Topher. The entire match had come to a halt as the seekers raced for the gold snitch. "Give it up, Potter," bellowed Topher.

"Fuck off," yelled James. Just then, the snitch dove left in front of James. In a wild attempt to get to the snitch Topher swerved left and collided with James, sending both boys spiraling to the ground. They both hit the ground head first with a dull thud, leaving both seekers sprawled motionless on the ground. A stick of lightning shed light on the pitch, and a loud crash of thunder covered the screams from the students in the stands.

"Oh my God," whispered Samantha and Lily at the same time. They thought they were dead. Slowly after several minutes, James lifted a fist into the air, holding the tiny gold snitch. The whole school erupted! Everyone was screaming, some over emotional girls were crying because they thought that they had died, and the Slytherins were booing, of course. Slowly the boys lifted themselves from the ground. Madam Pomphrey was trying to get the boys to follow her to the hospital wing so she could look at them. But neither wanted any part of it. When the reality had sunk in James was beaming and Topher was pissed. James had beat him, the perfect-Lily's-boyfriend Topher. While the rest of Gryffindor team and the whole school poured out onto the pitch, James was forced to shake Topher's hand.

"Potter, McKinley. Shake," hollered Madam Hooch from place in the middle of the pitch. When James reached Topher they shook, a little too long.

"Hey Potter, you know she's a really good kisser. Too bad she hates you," whispered Topher in a malicious voice just loud enough for James to hear. (a/n: ok you're probably thinking that Topher is just playing Lily, but he's not he actually really likes her. He's just trying to piss off James, back to the story.) With that lovely comment, James threw all magic aside and instead threw himself on to Topher and punched him as hard as he possibly could in the side of the head. Shocked Topher fell backwards and hit the ground. But before he could get up James had pulled out his wand and was pointing it at Topher. Topher jumped up, pulled out his wand and the boys stood about ten feet apart with their wands pointed at each other, rain soaking both of them.

"Potter! McKinley! What do you think you're doing?" scream McGonagall as she sprinted for the boys with her wand out. "Detention both of you. Lower your wands now! I SAID LOWER YOUR WANDS! DO I HAVE TO SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU?"

"No, Professor," murmured the boys lowering their wands but not taking their eyes off of each other. Finally both boys turned around.

"Oh my God, Topher are you ok?" asked Lily worriedly. "Here go to the hospital wing."

"I'll take him Lil," said Samantha as she hurried over to her brother.

"Are you sure? Ok, well I'll come check on you tonight, alright?" Lily asked.

"Yeah, I'll be fine don't worry about me," said Topher trying to put on a brave face for Lily. Lily watched through the pouring rain and lighting as Samantha an Tophe headed up to the castle. After Topher and Samantha were half way to the castle, Lily went to find her friends. Lily, Sirius, Abbey, Remus, and Peter were the only people left down at the Quidditch pitch and they were all waiting for James. Finally he came out of the locker room, beaming, well sort of because he was really happy he beat Topher, but he was still stung by what he had said. Mostly because it was true.

"Hey Evans. Did you see how you no talent boy toy, lost today? See if you had gone out with me, then at least you would be on the winning side. 'Cause it's no fun to mess around with losers. And the way he talks you would think you were some kind of trophy, but losers don't get trophies do they?" said James. For some reason he really wanted to hurt Lily. He had never felt that he needed to hurt her before, but now he was angry because she wasn't his.

"James," whispered Sirius warningly, "No, James."

But it was too late as another stick of lighting cracked through the clouds, James could see the refection in Lily's eyes – revealing her feelings at the moment. After staring at James for a long time, she walked up and slapped James across the face, spun on her heels and marched up to the castle.

"James are you stupid or something?" yelled Sirius.

Remus, Sirius, Abbey, and even Peter ran to catch up with Lily, leaving James alone with his thoughts and the pouring rain on the pitch. "Lily, Lily, wait up," called Remus. She turned around and when she noticed James was not with them she stopped and let them catch up with her. "He didn't mean that. He's just a little angry about, well you know."

"Yeah well he doesn't need to say things like that does he?" questioned Lily with tears in her eyes.

"No he doesn't, and I'm not defending him," said Remus softly. "Come here." Lily walked over to Remus and let him wrap his arms around her in a tight hug. It was comforting to know that her friends, were on her side on this one, and not defending the perfect Potter.

Lily was so mad at James that all she could think about was that she had to piss off James, hurt him. She watched as Sirius went up to the boy's dorm to get ready for bed, and she just saw James open up the portrait hole. Lily had an idea, so before James saw her Lily ran up to the boy's dorm and slowly opened the door. Sirius looked up when she came in, he already had his shirt off and was getting ready to climb into bed. "Hey Lil, what's up?" he asked, "Are you ok? I know James made you really mad, but he's really a good guy. He likes you a lot, and he was just being stupid."

"Yeah I know, but I don't think I'll ever like him back. It's just…I don't know, we're not a good match," said Lily as she took a step closer to Sirius. Lily wasn't sure exactly what she was going to do, but whatever it was she would have to do it quickly before James came in. Lily took another step towards Sirius, just as she heard someone start up the stairs to the dorm (they're long stairs); she hoped it was James. She came closer so they were no more than a foot apart, when Sirius finally noticed she was so close.

"Lily, what are you…" but before he could finish Lily had intertwined her fingers into his hair and was kissing him deeply. To Lily's surprise, Sirius started to kiss her back. Lily deepened the kiss, as she began to unbutton and take off her shirt, exposing a lacy black bra – she had to make this look good for James. Sirius didn't object, but before he knew what was going on Lily pulled him on to James's bed, and he was leaning over her as she continued to kiss him. She was running her hands over his rippling abs, and he was allowing his hands to roam up and down her back.

Just then, James opened the door to the boy's dorm. From James's point of view, it looked horrible because Sirius was practically in his boxers laying on Lily, and Lily under him without a shirt on. To him it looked like Sirius had forced himself on Lily, but she was kissing him, so she was obviously not too unwilling. But Sirius can be threatening…no the worst part was that they were passionately kissing each other. James was horrified. How the hell could Sirius do this to him? He knew how he felt about Lily; James felt betrayed by his best friend. His mind flew through a blur of emotion from confusion, to shock, to sadness, to anger, finally the anger took over James.

"WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?" roared James. He was so loud Lily even jumped. She suddenly realized how horrible a decision this was, James was going to kill one of them or both of them, and he probably could if he wanted to.

"Oh shit, man!" yelled Sirius, quickly jumping up from the bed, leaving Lily sprawled on the bed.

"What the hell is going on here? No you know what I don't want to hear it right now, later, yeah, but right now…" before James could even register what he was going to do he had lunged at Sirius. His fist collided hard with Sirius's jaw, sending a deafening crack through the dorm. And before Sirius could react James had punched him again right below his left eye. Sirius punched out hard and hit James in the stomach, sending him backwards. Both boys jumped up, grabbed their wands, and were pointing them at each other's hearts.

"I'm going to ask you again, what were you doing Sirius?" asked James in an attempt at calmness.

"I was…Lily… she kissed me mate…and I…I'm sorry….er…it just kind of…happened…"

Lily panicked, she was the one who started this, and Sirius had nothing to do with it. He didn't deserved to be beaten or hexed into oblivion. Lily leaped in front of James's wand. She knew that even if he was mad at her he would never curse her.

"James don't!" Lily yelled.

"What did he do to you Lily? Did he hurt you?" asked James his eyes filled with concern as he lowered his wand slightly.

"No he didn't hurt me. I…"

"Did he take off your shirt?" said James as he suddenly realized Lily was standing in front of him shirtless. Under any other circumstance he would have liked the view, but not right now.

"James no! Sirius didn't have anything to do with it! I kissed him, OK!" yelled Lily. For some reason she was actually angry that he cared for her so much.

"But, why… are you two going out?"

"No, we just…I…I was mad at you. So I did the only thing that I knew for sure would hurt you and piss you off, I'm sorry," said Lily looking at the ground. What had gotten in to her, she wasn't hurting him by apologizing, this was definitely not in the original plan. It was actually blowing her whole plan completely out of the water. Why did he make her feel and do things she never planned on doing? He had some kind of mental control over her emotions, it was sort of unnerving. Then without warning Lily ran from the room, without even bothering to pick up her shirt. She was scared to death that James would do something to her, or someone else, or himself. Because even though she didn't want to admit it, she was starting to actually care for James.

Back in the boy's dorm, "Sirius how could you do this to me?" asked James. He was calm now and was sitting dumbstruck on his bed, trying to figure out why Sirius had kissed her back, if what Lily said had been true.

"I'm really sorry James, but she came in and before I knew what was happening she started kissing me. It never even registered that this was your chick, that it was Lily. I just kind of went with the flow. I'm so sorry James. I wish I hadn't let it happen," said Sirius. He felt horrible because he was fully aware of how much this was hurting James, and it was his fault because he could have stopped it but didn't.

"It's ok Sirius, I'm not really blaming you. I was just kind of shocked to see Lily under you, on my bed. I thought you had raped her or something. Sorry, Padfoot."

"No it's ok. It would have looked pretty bad from you view point. I can see where you were coming from. But you should know me better than that. You know I wouldn't hurt you – you could kill me."

"Yeah I could, don't forget it. But it's a little weird to see your best mate making out with your future wife – maybe. Anyway, Is your jaw ok? Because I think you broke my hand," said James. Sirius was already developing a large purple lump under his left eye, and his jaw wasn't moving up and down quite as well as it should.

"It hurts pretty bad, but I don't want to go to the hospital wing. That would be way too embarrassing. Especially explaining why we were throwing blows at each other. But at least I got you in the stomach, so we're even now."

"Yeah you did and I wasn't flexed so I think I have quite the bruise," James lifted up his shirt to reveal and large purple bruise already forming. "Wow, man you are way too strong. Never do that again, please. And I think that you got my nose too because it hurts like no other."

"I can't exactly say that you didn't deserve it after today," joked Sirius.

"Oh go climb a tree," said James.

I kind of like this chapter, but I don't really know why, it just floats my boat. Maybe cause I haven't really seen James and Sirius fight over anything before, and it shows how close they are by showing how much they care for each other. For anyone else, save Remus, they would have hexed them into the hospital wing and never talked to that person again, but James and Sirius have an awesome understanding with each other. Anyway please, please, r/r because if I don't get anymore reviews, I can't write much more. I want to know what ya'll think good, bad, or indifferent, please review. (Spill, Rae, and Slam, ya'll are the best ever, by the way). Thanx.


	4. Aftermath

Chapter 4

Lily ran through the common room, and was putting on quite the spectacle for the 5 or 6 3rd year boys still doing homework. As Lily ran up to her dorm she was followed by cat calls and whistles, but she didn't hear them she was too concerned with what she had just done. She had cause Sirius and James to beat each other, and for no real apparent reason. Yeah James had made comments that made her angry, but so what he had been doing things like that since 1st year. Then Lily decided to go see how Topher was doing, at least that would take her mind off of things. But one thing was still bothering her, why would she care about what James said unless she liked him. Lily quickly shook the thoughts out of her head, and decided that she was just thinking too deeply into things.

"Sirius, I'm going to go for a walk. I need to figure out a few things, you know about me, Abbey, Lily, and just everything in general," said James as he lay awake in his bed.

"Ok man, whatever works for you. Do you want me to come with you?" asked Sirius.

"No, plus you don't want to, I can tell," replied James as he pulled on some pants, a hoodie, grabbed his cloak, and the Marauder' Map, just in case.

"You're right, I don't want to come, but I figured I'd offer to sound like I care about it or something," mumbled Sirius as he started to fall off to sleep.

When James reached the common room he saw Remus and Peter trying to finish some transfiguration homework. Well, it was more like Remus was trying to help Peter finish Transfiguration homework. "I'm going for a walk so I'll see you in a bit, k?"

"Yeah see you later James," said a very frustrated Remus. "Now Pete lets try this again, Swish, flick and poke. It's one clean movement, oh for God's sake Peter you're an animagus this should be a piece of cake for you."

At the same time Lily was saying good bye to Topher, Samantha, and Abbey. "Night babe, hope you feel better in the morning," whispered Lily, lightly kissing Topher.

"Cya tomorrow."

Madam Pomphrey had shooed out Abbey, Sam, and Lily because it was eight thirty and the hospital wing was closing to visitors.

"Hey, I'll see you guys later. I'm just going to go for walk, you know try to get my thoughts together," Lily said to Samantha and Abbey.

"Ok, see ya Lily. Don't get caught if you're out too late!" called Sam to Lily's retreating back as she walked down the corridor. As Lily came around the corner she saw James's back whip around the corner, and a large piece of parchment fell out of his bag.

"Hm…what's this?" Lily picked up the parchment, "The Marauder's Map," read Lily, "Well, well, well, of course should have known the marauders would come up with some sort of tricked up map." Lily opened the map still visible because James hadn't cleared it yet. "Wow, this is amazing," said Lily. While she was looking at the map, she saw a little moving dot that said 'James Potter' and another dot that said 'Lily Evans,' there was one for Filch and one for Dumbledore, McGonagall, and Panes. Lily put the map in her bag as she headed out onto the snowy grounds, it was an incredible sight, the almost full moon lit up the light snow. '_I wonder where wonder boy Potter has gone, I can't see him anywhere, and the map showed him out on the grounds, oh well it doesn't really matter anyway_' thought Lily as she pulled her cloak tighter around her. What Lily didn't know, was that she was bring watched, by James.

He was on the other side of the lake, and when he saw Lily walk out of the front doors he decided to just sit on a rock and watch her. She was so beautiful, in his eyes, but he just couldn't seem to get her to fall for him like other girls did. But in the back of his mind he kept seeing Lily kissing Sirius, and wishing that that was him she was kissing. Then James had an idea, yes folks an idea, good for you James, Lily wouldn't trust or talk to James, but she would probably talk to or possibly ride Prongs. So following his outrageous scheme, James transformed and began to make his way around the lake to where Lily was lying just admiring the stars.

Lily heard soft thuds coming closer to her, it sounded like soft hoof beats. Hmm…that was weird. Then Lily saw a gorgeous stag cantering around the lake to where she was. '_Odd_,' thought Lily as the stag slowed down and stopped in front of her, 'I wonder if he's friendly.' Most of the time, especially in the muggle world you wouldn't trust some random wild animal, but this was the magical world and the animals were more intelligent than most or at least had some odd magic in them that kept them from injuring humans for sport. "Hey boy, sorry I don't have any food for you."

The stag just stamped the ground where he was and looked at her with huge, deep, brown eyes. For some reason this animal was comforting, and made Lily feel like she could, I don't know, talk to it. (a/n: I love animals for that, you talk they listen, don't talk back, and always take your side on the matter) Lily sat back down into the soft snow, and to her absolute amazement the stag bent his knees and gently fell to the ground as well. "You don't want food do you? Well that would be a perk, but…oh goodness I can't believe I'm talking to a stag," laughed Lily.

James couldn't have been happier, Lily was sitting next to him stroking his forehead, ok not exactly romantic, but it felt good as a stag, and talking to him without the usual scowl she wore when she talked to James Potter. But either way she was there, and even if she had a boyfriend, she thought he was a stag, and hated him relentlessly, this moment was still perfect in James's eyes.

"Do you know what I mean, boy? Course you don't, sorry. But it's just so confusing I don't think I like James, but I feel jealous when I see him around Abbey. It's like she's accidentally butting in on my territory, the territory that has always been mine. Like a comfort zone, but then I hurt him so badly today that I don't think he's ever going to talk to me again. And I actually felt bad about it! I sort of care for him, I guess, I mean I don't want anything bad to happen to him. He just always hanging around all the time; especially around Topher. Topher, now that's a relationship I really can't understand. He's so sweet and he's generally perfect, but something isn't right. It's just like, er, we aren't 'meant to be.' He's not the one, but I don't really know who is. I know who wants to be 'the one,' but one day James is going to wake up, smell the coffee, and realize that he has to move on. But what if I'm all wrong? What if I am really meant to be with James, and I'm just living my life in denial of my true feelings. I don't know what I would do if I was really meant to be with James and never gave him a chance. Maybe I should go out with James and see if we really are meant to be. Sometimes I actually like James, but other times I don't. Like when he's picking on people like Snape. Yes Snape's a jerk, but James doesn't have to be so mean to him just because he can. He knows that people like him and hate Snape, so he thinks that gives him permission to do anything he wants to him. Wow I'm so confused. I don't know what I'm going to do, arg, this is all so confusing and I can't really talk to anyone about it because no one understands. They would all just tell me to go out with James and be happy, but I can't be happy if I'm being forced to go out with someone. Can I?" As Lily concluded her little speech James decided to see if she would ride him.

So he slowly got up, but only half way. Inviting Lily to climb on, and Lily luckily caught on to the stag's movements and climbed up his back. James began to trot around slowly, and as smoothly as possible, so not to throw her off balance. When he realized she was going to be ok, he started to slowly canter. After about twenty minutes of roaming around the grounds, the stag slowly came to a halt and gently let Lily slide off.

"Thanks boy, you're amazing," said Lily as she gave the stag a kiss on the nose. As she walked away Lily remembered another thing that had been bothering her, "Oh yeah and what's up with their little nick names. I mean really Prongs who goes by Prongs? You'd think he had horns or something…..JAMES POTTER!" screamed Lily, realization suddenly flooding through her.

Hey hey! Yeah I know that Lily's speech is a little confusing, but it's supposed to be, b/c she's just rambleing. Sometimes it feel better if I can just sit down and talk to someone (well sometimes I use my horse's ever listening ears, poor girl), and even if what I'm saying makes no sense I feel better just talking. So Lily is doing just that- talking nonsense. PLEASE review, if you love it hate it don't care tell me I'm open to anything. So take a sec, please (see i'm being polite) and write good, bad, anything really. thanx.


	5. Dreams Just for You

Chapter 5

"James Potter! I hate you! Arg…this is stupid. Repertulla!" screamed Lily. With her spell, she forced the huge stag into the twitchy form of James Potter.

"Lily, Lily no do not take it like that! I was just roaming around, and I saw you, and um…ok this isn't going well, and I don't have a good excuse. Just yell at me or whatever you're going to do," said James in a defeated voice. He realized that this was stupid no matter what he said she was still going to be mad at him, and there was absolutely nothing he could do about it. When Lily decided on something she followed it, unfortunately James was the victim of the wrath of Lily today.

"Potter! How could you deceive me like that? And since when are you an animagus? And is Sirius and Peter animagi, too? I'm sure Dumbledore would love to know that wonder boy Potter blew his trust, and has been changing into animals in his spare time. Are you running around with Remus when he changes? That's really dangerous, and I'm positive Dumbledore would love to here about that. Oh yes, I'm sure the ministry and Dumbledore will be very happy to know there are like three unregistered animagi running around," yelled Lily, she was so mad she could explode. "Speaking of blowing trust. What about me? You led me on to think you were a freakin' animal, and of course I started talking to you like you were an animal. If you didn't want to change in front of me why didn't you just run off into the forest, it's not like I would have questioned a 'wild' stag running away. James, I told you stuff no one was supposed to hear. How could you? Why would you do this to me?" Lily was yelling furiously at James, but to his surprise James was starting to get mad.

"Well maybe if you talked to me and even somewhat treated me like a person we wouldn't have this problem!" yelled James. "All I want to do is talk to you damn it! So the only way I could get close to you was to turn into an animal. I wasn't originally trying to get info out of you I just wanted to be around you, Lily. God you make me so angry some times. Do you see how low I go for you I punched my best friend because I thought he had hurt you, and I turn into a freakin animal for you! Don't you realize I would never think about touching a hair on Sirius's head for any other person?"

"Oh no, don't you put the guilt trip on me, Potter. I never asked you to hang around and save me. It's not like we have a connection. We have no attachment to each other. And oh yeah let's recall the rude comments earlier. Hmm yeah, that wasn't exactly the actions of someone who wants to be with me," snarled Lily sarcastically. 

"Lily what is wrong with you! What is it today? Let's see how badly we can hurt James day because if it is you are sure celebrating to the fullest. For once Lily, try to look around and notice everyone around you, the world does not revolve around you, Lily!" yelled James angrily. They were really close now only about a foot apart yelling in each other's faces.

"Revolve around me! Hmm that's funny considering it came from your mouth, Mr. I'm-God's-gift-to-women and you should worship the ground I walk on. James you don't care about anyone else. All you care about is winning Quidditch games and boosting your popularity. You say that you care about me, but you don't you are rude to me, you don't listen to me or anyone else for that matter. James, you don't care about me or you wouldn't act like you do," said Lily. She was much quieter now because she was tired of fighting with him. It wasn't getting them anywhere, and Lily was losing her energy to continue to yell at him. Tears were now streaming down Lily's pretty face, she didn't want to hurt him, but she was tired of his attitude.

"Lily, I…I'm sorry Lily. I, well, I don't know what to say because you kind of summed up everything, but you were wrong on one point. Lily, I do care about you. I know I don't show it quite as thoroughly as I should and I know I can be a bastard sometimes. But you have to believe me when I say that I do care about you, I might even love you but I can't tell because you won't let me close to you. Lily you have to believe me, please," pleaded James. This was the decisive moment for James, was Lily going to believe him and let him in or was she going to runaway and leave him forever. If she left he would never know if they could have had something together. You never know if you have something until you take a chance and play your cards, and James was throwing all the chips down.

Then Lily did something that shocked both of them, she leaned in and kissed James lightly. James slid his arm around her waist and deepened the kiss, while Lily curled her arms around his neck. '_I want it to be like this forever_,' thought James. Finally, James broke the kiss and simply pulled Lily closer into a tight hug.

Lily felt oddly safe in his strong arms as she buried her tear stained face in his shoulder. They fit, just like a pair of worn jeans – just right. They stood like that for a long time while the snow fell all around them. It looked like someone had shaken a snow globe, and plopped James and Lily into its winter wonderland. "Look, Lily, I don't know what kind of feelings you have for me, but I want you to know that if you ever need someone to talk to Prongs is always waiting," smiled James kissing her forehead.

"Thanks…Prongs," said Lily looking up at him and smiling. "Hey I think we should go back inside, it's a little cold out here. Don't you think? And, JAMES! It's 12:30 we're never going to be able to get in safely. Oh no, I can't get in trouble it's only the 2nd month at school," whined Lily. Lily wasn't one to get in trouble, and she wanted to keep up that reputation.

"Lil, don't worry, I have a couple tricks to get us in without a problem," said James calmly because frankly it didn't matter to him if he got caught, what's another detention? They started to make their way around the lake to get to James's bag, that had the invisibility cloak, and he thought, it had the map too. "Where is it? I know I brought it with me. It can't be gone we spent too much time on that thing to lose it. Oh they are going to kill me if it's gone," moaned James. 

"Looking for this, Potter?" asked Lily as she held up the map for James to see.

"Where did you get that?"

"I snuck into your room one night while you were sleeping and took it. No, you dropped it while you were running out to the grounds. Clever map you have here," said Lily matter of factly.

"How do you know how to work it?"

"Well it's not really a problem when the map it still showing. You should be more careful with such things."

"Come here get under this, and we can get in without a problem," said James as he held up the invisibility cloak for Lily to get under.

"Why do you have all of this stuff?"

"How do you think we pull off all of our pranks? I mean you can't just walk up behind Snape and dump spaghetti on his head now can you?"

"Oh that was you, was it?" Lily even laughed as she remembered when the bowl of spaghetti had fallen on Snape's head. No one knew who had done it, and the very memory of Snape spinning in circles and lashing out with spaghetti stuck in this long greasy hair was one of the funniest things in all of Lily's years at Hogwarts.

That night Lily and James both returned safely, as promised, to the Gryffindor common room. "Night Lily," whispered James lightly kissing her forehead. 

"Night."

While James got into bed, all he could think about was how perfect that moment was with Lily wrapped up in his arms. But he knew that when he woke up tomorrow morning it would all go back to the way it was before. Lily would hang out with Topher, he would hang out with Abbey, Lily would be slightly unfriendly, and he would be conceited. But for one night everything felt like it was going to be alright in the end.

James drifted off into blissful sleep, and before he knew it he was at a wedding. His wedding. He was wearing a tux, and he turned around to see Sirius beaming next to him as his best man. James looked down the aisle to see whom he was marrying, and to his astonishment, and happiness, he saw bright green eyes staring back at him. Lily was walking down the aisle towards him. The ceremony sped up and James heard Lily and then himself say 'I do.'

Then James was in a hospital room holding an infant baby with bright green eyes and whole head of black hair.

James was being thrown forward into another room where he could hear Lily screaming bloody murder. He watched as he saw himself only older, yelling for Lily to run away. Then he saw Lily in the corner trying to hide the baby, as she fought with a wizard screaming, "Please not Harry," but James couldn't figure out who the wizard was. There was a blast of green light and James watched as Lily fell to the ground motionless – dead.

When he tried to get to her James found himself spinning through the air and when it stopped he was watching what looked to be himself, only the boy had Lily's eyes and a lightning scar on his forehead, diving through the air in pursuit of the snitch. When he caught it the announcer was screaming, "Harry Potter catches the snitch! Harry Potter wins the game and the cup for Gryffindor!" '_That's my son_,' thought James. Then the boy was holding up the Quidditch cup.

James was sent spinning through the air again, and this time he landed in the shrieking shack. Harry, a red haired boy, and a girl with bushy hair were standing with their wands pointed at a man on the ground. The man looked like he hadn't eaten in years, his hair was long and greasy, and his robes were torn. "You killed my parents," snarled Harry at the man on the ground.

Then another man was in the room, "Forgive me Remus," said Sirius to the other man, Remus. "And you will, in turn, forgive me for believing you were the spy?" (Rowling, Prisoner) said Remus.

The scene changed again now there was a small man crawling on the ground, "Hello Peter," said Remus. "This piece of vermin is the reason you have no parents," said Sirius to Harry. "I know but I don't reckon my dad would've wanted you to become killers – just for him," (Rowling, Prisoner) spat Harry. (a/n: I know that's not the exact quotes, but I don't have the book in front of me. It's something to that effect. Sorry.) Then Sirius was talking to Harry, "I don't know if anyone ever told you, but I'm your god father."

Then James was standing in a graveyard, Harry was tied to a tombstone screaming in pain – Crucio. In front of him was a small man with a robe and a little creature in a cauldron. The little man was slicing Harry's arm. Then there was a group of wizards in robes and Harry and an odd looking creature who looked to be half snake was standing in front of him. James could hear Harry's thoughts, '_I'm not just going to kneel down at Voldemort's feet. I'm going to die like a man, fighting like my dad_' (Rowling, Goblet).

Then Sirius was talking to Harry, "Harry, your father was the best friend I ever had."

James turned around and he was in a room full of people fighting and dueling. He saw Sirius dueling with an older form of his cousin Bellatrix. Then Sirius fell through this odd looking veil, James knew he was dead. "SHE KILLED HIM! I'LL KILL HER!" (Rowling, Order) bellowed Harry.

Finally, James fell onto the Hogwarts grounds and he was watching Harry roaming around. He looked depressed and lost. James could almost feel his emotions, and he knew Harry had lost everything.

James woke up sweaty and shaking all of the images he had just seen came flying through his head like a slide show. He could remember every tiny detail, the emotions, the words, every characteristic of the people, of his son. But James couldn't forget the form of Lily dying in front of his eyes, trying to save their son. He couldn't forget the look on Harry's face when he realized Sirius was dead. Suddenly a thought ran through James's mind, '_I must be dead too_.' If he wasn't dead Sirius wouldn't need to be taking on his godfather duties, and James remembered Sirius's words. "This piece of vermin is the reason you have no parents." '_No parents. Lily and I are dead_,' thought James. James climbed out of bed and walked down to the common room, shaking and scared. The images that ran through his head were unnerving even though they were all just in a dream.

Odd feelings were running through him, he was feeling proud of his son. The son he didn't have, had never seen, may never see, and only saw in a dream. But he had never been so proud all the same. He sat down in his favorite armchair, by the fire and recalled the dream. His son played Quidditch, he married Lily, someone was hurting Harry, Harry was brave, someone was betrayed, Sirius was dead, some guy named Voldemort was trying to kill Harry, Lily died, Harry was depressed about something, James kept running the dream through his head. '_Get a grip, James, it was just a dream and dreams aren't reality, right?_' James stayed in the common room for a long time trying to calm himself down, and get a grip on himself.

Meanwhile in the girls dorm Lily was lying awake staring at the ceiling in her bed thinking about the pretty much awful, but great day she had had. First James had won the Quidditch match, then he punched Topher, then he was flat out rude to her, then she kissed Sirius, then James punched Sirius, then she went outside, then he came outside, then she talked to the stag, rode the stag, fought with James, kissed James, and had been thinking about James for the last several hours.

But Lily was pretty sure that this was a rare day, and that when she woke up tomorrow James would be his conceited self. Then there was her new dilemma with Topher, she had kissed two guys today while she was going out with him. Sirius had meant nothing, but James was a little different; although, she still wasn't fond of him she had an odd sense of security kissing and hugging him. '_What if Potter tells someone and they tell Topher_,' wondered Lily because she didn't want to break up with or hurt Topher. '_I'll figure it out in the morning,_' thought Lily as she drifted off to sleep.

Hey guys, I know this is a little sad because James is feeling pain due to the dream, but without the bad you can't fully appreciate the good. Plus, he gets to feel feelings he's never going to get to experience, like fatherly pride. Anyway, I like the fact that he can look into the future and see what his son will accomplish. Thanx, you guys rock. r/r


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